~तेरी हिफाजत में अपने जान भी लगा दूंगा,

तेरे हर दर्द को अपनी मुस्कान बना लूंगा।
तू रहे सलामत, ये दुआ है रब से,
तेरी दुनिया के हर ग़म को मिटा दूंगा।~

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Avantika's POV

I was wearing a red suit today, paired with delicate gold jhumkas and a light chiffon dupatta. The fabric felt soft against my skin, but my heart was racing for an entirely different reason.

The mention of him-Avyansh ji-coming back today echoed from the living room. My cheeks flushed at the thought. I shouldn't feel this way. I told myself it was nothing. Yet, I couldn't stop the fluttering in my chest.

"Dev!" I called out. Yes, I call him Dev now. The formality of "ji" seemed unnecessary between us after all the chaos he'd managed to stir up.

"Ji, Bhabhii!" he shouted back dramatically.

"Apki chai!" I shouted, holding the tray in my hands as he sprinted toward me like some sort of Bollywood hero.

Sliding to a stop, he stretched his hand out with exaggerated flair and grabbed a cup from the tray.

I raised my eyebrow, barely holding back a laugh. "Yeh apki chai nahi hai! Jaiye, kitchen se le lijiye. Yeh baaki sab ke liye hai."

His face scrunched up, a perfect picture of mock betrayal. With a dramatic huff, he stomped off toward the kitchen.

I shook my head, a small smile tugging at my lips. My heart, however, refused to calm down. He was coming back today.

How would things be? Would it feel the same as before, or had the distance changed something between us?

Focus, Avantika, I told myself, carrying the tray to the living room. But no matter how much I tried, my thoughts were already where my heart was-on him.

I feel more at home here. As I served tea to Mummy, Choti Mummy, and Dadi Maa, a warmth spread in my heart. Devika helped me with the cups, her cheerful chatter filling the silence, but my mind wasn't fully present.

This past week wasn't as good as I had hoped. I had started attending classes two days ago, accompanied by two bodyguards who followed me everywhere.

While it was meant to provide safety, it only made me feel more isolated, like a caged bird.

But it was the nights that were the hardest. The emptiness gnawed at me, and I couldn't sleep properly. My thoughts spiraled into chaos-memories, emotions, fears. It was as if my mind wanted me to stop feeling, to shut everything out.

And then, the dreams returned.

He grabbed my hand, forcing me down onto the bed. His grip was cold and cruel. My body froze as the weight of the old memory crashed over me. My breathing quickened, and my hands started trembling.

"No...no...not again," I whispered, trying to shake off the suffocating feeling. My chest felt tight, like I couldn't breathe.

But it didn't.

My heartbeat raced, thundering in my ears. The trauma, the helplessness-it was all coming back, dragging me down into its dark abyss.

I don't want to feel this again. I don't want to be weak.

The cup slipped from my hand, and the scalding tea splashed onto my skin.

"Avantika!" multiple voices called out in alarm as everyone around me jumped to their feet.

I didn't even flinch. The burning sensation was sharp, but it didn't compare to the chaos in my mind. My focus blurred, and my eyes welled with unshed tears-not from the pain, but from everything I had been holding back.

I stared at my reddening hand, the sound of their voices fading into the background. Mummy and Choti Mummy were shouting something, Dadi Maa was calling out for the first-aid box, but it felt like I was underwater.

Suddenly, cool relief.

I glanced down to see Dev gently lowering my hand into a bowl of ice water, his face a mixture of worry and guilt. "Why didn't you say anything, Bhabhi?!" he asked, his voice almost scolding but laced with concern.

Everyone surrounded me, their words overlapping.

"Are you okay?"
"Why didn't you move your hand?"
"Kuch toh bol, beta!"

I remained silent, my lips pressed tightly together. Their voices were loud, but inside, it was eerily quiet. I could feel the burn throbbing, but it wasn't enough to drown out the weight in my chest.

"Bas, sab log shant ho jao," Dadi Maa said firmly, taking control of the situation. She crouched beside me, her eyes scanning my face. "Avantika, zyda pain ho rha hai?

I finally managed a faint nod, unable to look anyone in the eye.

"Dev, us ice bowl ko idhar rakh," Dadi Maa instructed, her calm voice cutting through the panic.

I wanted to say something to ease their worry, to tell them I was fine, but the words wouldn't come. Instead, I sat there, letting them fuss over me, while my mind continued to spiral deeper.

I sat in my room, my hand now covered with a cooling cream, wrapped in soft gauze. The pain was dull, manageable, but the ache in my chest felt unbearable.

Just moments ago, I was smiling, wasn't I? Thinking about him, about how he'd be here soon. My heart was lighter for a while-excited, even. So why now? Why did that memory barge in like an uninvited guest?

My gaze fell on my bandaged hand. It wasn't the burn that stung; it was the flood of emotions that came with it.

That memory-the one I had locked away so tightly-had slipped out. His voice, his anger, the way he'd grabbed me. The bed. The helplessness.

My breathing hitched. Why now? Why, when I was finally feeling a little... happy?

I pressed my uninjured hand to my chest, trying to steady the rapid thudding of my heart. The familiar weight of dread settled in, suffocating and relentless.

"Stop it," I whispered to myself. "Stop thinking about it."

But the images wouldn't leave. The pain, the fear, the way my body had frozen back then. My throat felt dry as my pulse quickened. My nails dug into my palm as I squeezed my hand into a fist, trying to ground myself.

Tears pricked my eyes, and I blinked them away. I didn't want to cry. Not now. Not again.

I leaned my head back against the wall, closing my eyes tightly. Why does this keep happening? Every time I think I've moved on, every time I feel like I can breathe again, that memory comes back to haunt me.

It felt like a cruel joke, as if happiness was something I wasn't allowed to have.

Author's POV

The room was filled with light chatter and laughter as Choti Mummy and the rest of the family surrounded Avantika. The old photo album was splayed open on the bed, childhood pictures of Devika , Dev and Avyansh providing endless amusement.

"Aur yeh dekho, yeh Devika," Choti Mummy said, pointing to a picture of a little Devika dressed as a tree.

Avantika couldn't help but chuckle, though the laughter wasn't entirely carefree. It felt good to have a distraction, even for a while.

"Bhabhi! Aap mazak bana rahi ho mera!" Devika whined, her cheeks puffing in a slight pout.

Dev smirked from the other side of the room. "Hey, don't you look like a pig!" he teased, making Avantika laugh harder.

"Tujhe mai baad mai btaungi." Devika warned, trying to maintain her composure but failing miserably.

Avantika, unable to resist joining in, said. "Yeh itne saare real trees ke saath sirf aap akeli fake tree kyun ho?"

Devika gasped dramatically before hiding her embarrassed face in Anjali Shoulder.

"Arrey, inn madam ko acting aati nahi thi!" Pakhi chimed in, shaking her head with mock disapproval.

"Isliye drama mein kisi ne isse liya nahi," Anjali added, barely suppressing her laughter.

"And then," Pakhi continued, "she cried so much about it that Avyansh had to step in."

"Oh" Avantika muttered her interest piqued as her gaze moved to a photo of a young, serious-looking Avyansh.

"He went to the school and tried convincing the teachers to give her a role. Kuch bhi, even the smallest part!" Anjali recounted, laughing. "Lekin tab tak sab roles already assigned ho gaye the."

Devika groaned softly. "Aur phir mujhe last moment pe ek tree banne ko diya."

Avantika couldn't stop her laughter this time. The image of a little Devika crying over being cast as a tree and Avyansh trying to fix it felt endearing and oddly sweet.

"Woh bhi tree!" Avantika teased gently.

"Bas karo, bhabhi!" Devika said, covering her face with her hands, but she couldn't hide her smile.

Amidst the laughter, Avantika felt a slight warmth in her heart. For the first time today, the heaviness in her chest felt a little lighter.

Avantika's gaze remained fixed on the picture of the little boy bathing in a small pool, surrounded by women dressed in delicate lehengas.

The boy looked like a young prince, laughing gleefully as he held onto one of the women's long braids.

"Who is he?" Avantika asked, her curiosity evident.

Anjali smirked mischievously and leaned closer. "Isse nahi pehchana?" she teased.

Avantika looked up at her and shook her head. "Nahi," she replied, still confused.

Before Anjali could answer, a maid appeared at the doorway, slightly breathless. "Ma'am, Bade Sahab aa gaye," she announced.

The room erupted in activity, everyone turning their heads toward the maid.

"Bhai aa gaye?" Devika chimed, her excitement unmissable.

Dev rolled his eyes dramatically. "Itni khushi jis cheez ke liye dikha rahi hai, I just pray Bhai hasn't brought your things this time," he teased, earning a glare from Devika.

Anjali laughed. "Jao, Avyansh se hi puch lo kaun hai yeh."

Avantika glanced at the picture one last time before standing, her heart fluttering slightly. She wasn't sure why she felt this way, but the mention of Avyansh's arrival had sparked something in her.

"Chlo jaldi chalo!" Devika urged, already heading for the door.

As everyone left the room, Avantika stayed behind for a moment, her eyes lingering on the photo.

She shake her head and With that, she followed the others, her heartbeat quickening as she walked toward the entrance hall.

Avyansh stepped into the house, his tall frame exuding an air of authority. His sharp gaze swept across the room as he greeted everyone with quiet respect.

"Maa," he said, bending slightly to touch Pakhi's feet, followed by Anjali's and Maanyata's.

Each time, he straightened with a slight nod, his expression calm but detached. Dev and Devika hurried forward to touch his feet as well.

"Bhai, my gift?" Dev asked excitedly, his grin wide.

Avyansh gave a faint smile, snapping his fingers lightly. A few guards entered, each carrying small, intricately wrapped boxes. "Distribute these," he said curtly, gesturing to the staff.

Before he could take another step, Pakhi enveloped him in a warm hug. "Beta, you've gotten even thinner! Khaana khao achhe se."

He returned the hug with measured restraint, gently patting her shoulder. A faint smile tugged at his lips, though his eyes seemed distant.

Memories flashed unbidden in his mind. Once upon a time, he had been a child who loved hugs, a boy who ran into the house after school and hugged everyone until he felt content.

But that changed. He had learned that not all touches were comforting-some could steal innocence under the guise of affection.

The memory of that woman's touch still lingered, unsettling him even after years had passed. He had grown cautious, keeping people at arm's length, a habit born out of quiet self-preservation.

He took a seat on the large couch, his posture relaxed yet distant, the faintest flicker of weariness in his otherwise composed demeanor.

The buzz of conversation and laughter filled the room, but his eyes began to scan the space, seeking something-or rather, someone.

"What happened, beta? Are you looking for someone?" Maanyata asked, her tone laced with curiosity or say fake curiosity.

For a moment, his gaze lingered near the stairs hoping she would come too.Then, masking his expression, he leaned back slightly, his voice low and composed. "No. Just tired."

But the slight crease on his brow betrayed him.

Avantika came and stood quietly behind Maanyata, trying to blend in with the lively chatter around her.

"Uh hm..." Dev cleared his throat, his voice dripping with mischief.

"I'm going to change and rest a little," Avyansh said casually, getting up from his seat. Without sparing a glance at Avantika, he made his way toward their room.

Avantika stood frozen, her smile fading as the realization hit her. He hadn't even noticed her presence.

Her mind spiraled. He didn't even glance at me? Was I invisible, or was that affection from before just an act? Did I get too comfortable around him? Maybe I should've stayed in my shell... I probably should never step out of it again.

The inner storm grew louder. Does he also think I'm worthless? Do I look too thin? Maybe my dark circles have worsened, or is it the scar making me undesirable?

The lively chatter and teasing around her felt distant, muffled by the whirlwind of self-doubt in her head.

"Bhabhi, are you okay?" Devika's concerned voice cut through the fog.

"Huh?" Avantika blinked, snapping back to the present.

"You look pale suddenly," Devika said, her brows furrowed with worry.

"Go to your room now and rest a little now beta." Pakhi chimed in, her voice laced with care.

Avantika nodded faintly, her legs moving on autopilot toward her room. As she was about to leave, her ears caught Dev teasing voice.

"Ask him about that photo!"

Avantika paused momentarily, glancing back at the group, before continuing toward her room, her thoughts still tangled.

Avantika entered the room, her gaze immediately landing on him. He sat on the couch, leaning back slightly, his posture exhausted yet composed.

The sleeves of his shirt were rolled up, exposing his muscular forearms with veins faintly popping out-a detail that held her attention longer than it should have.

His clothes were carelessly tossed onto the couch, leaving him in just his shirt and pants, an air of casual elegance surrounding him.

She quickly diverted her focus and moved toward the bed, where the photo albums lay scattered. Quietly, she began gathering them, hoping to avoid his attention.

But his gaze followed her movements.

"Apke haathon ko kya hua, Avantika?" he asked, his deep voice cutting through the silence.

Startled, she glanced down at her hand, where faint redness from the burn still lingered. Her heart skipped a beat at his sudden concern.

"Kuch nahi... just a little burn," she replied, trying to sound nonchalant.

Before she could react, he stood and walked over to her, closing the distance in a few strides. He sat beside her and gently took her hand in his. His touch was surprisingly careful, a stark contrast to his usual cold demeanor.

"Why are you so careless?" he asked, his tone laced with faint irritation, though his concern was evident.

Her instinctive response was defensive, perhaps a result of the walls she'd built around herself. "Why do you care?" she retorted, tugging her hand back slightly.

The words had barely escaped her lips when regret flooded her. His expression shifted, a flicker of hurt crossing his features before he masked it. He let go of her hand but didn't look away.

"I am sorry. I didn't mean..." she started, her voice soft, filled with guilt.

"It's okay," he cut her off, his tone steady but distant. He paused for a moment before glancing at the albums. "Btw, what were you looking at?" he asked, clearly changing the subject.

Avantika blinked, caught off guard by the shift. She hesitated before holding up one of the photo albums. "Childhood photos. Choti mummy and the others were showing them."

Suddenly, his calm expression shifted to one of panic. His hand instinctively moved to grab the photo he was staring at, but Avantika noticed his reaction.

Curious, she leaned over and snatched the picture before he could stop her.

"Avantika-!" he started, his voice slightly stern, but it was too late.

She turned the photo around to see it clearly, her eyes widening in disbelief.

It was a picture of a little boy covered in mud from head to toe, smiling with his teeth showing and his nose adorably scrunched. The child wore no clothes, only a thin piece of fabric loosely wrapped around him.

Avantika stared at the photo, then glanced at Avyansh, who looked mortified.

"It's you?" she asked, her voice trembling with suppressed laughter.

His cheeks turned red, something she had never seen before. "Give it back," he muttered, his hand reaching out for the photo.

But Avantika, unable to control herself, burst out laughing, clutching the photo tightly.

"I can't believe this! You are looking like a... a..." she couldn't finish her sentence as laughter took over.

Avyansh's ears turned crimson. "That was a school play, alright?" he said defensively.

"Oh really? What role were you playing? The King of Mud? Or a Pig" she teased, her laugh ringing out in the room.

"Avantika, I'm serious. Hand it over," he warned, though his tone lacked the sharpness it usually carried.

"I want it in my gallery to show it to everyone," she added with a small smile.

Her mischievous gaze moved towards her phone lying on the side table. She made a move to stand up and grab it, but before she could, a sudden force tugged on her wrist, pulling her back.

With a gasp, she landed against him, her body pressing slightly against his. Before she could even process the moment, he swiftly turned, reversing their positions in an instant.

Now, with her lying beneath him and his strong frame hovering above her, she felt the heat radiate between them. His intense gaze locked onto hers, filled with an unreadable emotion.

"So, what were you saying, Mrs. Raghuvanshi?" he asked, his voice deep, calm, but with a teasing edge. His lips curved into a faint smirk as his hand braced beside her head, caging her gently.

Her cheeks turned crimson, her heartbeat loud in her ears. She opened her mouth to respond but closed it again, her words failing her as his face lingered too close, his warm breath brushing her skin.

Avantika's heart raced as he lean more closer. The intensity of his gaze made her pulse quicken. She held the photo in her hands, refusing to hand it over just yet, her eyes lingering on his youthful, mud-covered face in the picture. She chuckled softly, shaking her head.

"You were a mess as a kid," she teased, her lips curling into a mischievous smile.

Avantika's playful expression faltered the moment he leaned closer. Her body went rigid, her gaze locking onto nothing in particular, and then her breaths began to quicken-shallow, erratic gasps as if the air itself had turned toxic.

The warmth of the room suddenly suffocated her, replaced by an icy coldness that crept through her veins.

Her mind spiraled.

The memory slammed into her with brutal force. The bed beneath her disappeared, replaced by another bed, another room.

His weight pressed her down, the sickening strength of his hands pinning her wrists above her head. She could feel his breath on her neck, hot and invasive, his voice whispering threats that made her blood curdle.

"No... no..." The words escaped her lips in a fragile, broken whisper. Her wide eyes darted around the room, but all she could see was him.

The way he had smiled-a twisted, cruel mockery of control. The way she had screamed until her throat burned, only for no one to come.

Her chest heaved violently as she clawed at the bedsheets beneath her, trying to ground herself, but the fabric felt like his hands-unyielding, trapping her.

"No!" she suddenly shrieked, her voice breaking with terror. She pushed herself back against the headboard, knees drawing to her chest as her trembling hands wrapped protectively around herself.

Her nails dug into her arms, the faint sting grounding her for only a moment before another wave of memories drowned her.

"Please, no! I'm sorry! Don't do this!" Her voice cracked, desperation and terror lacing every word. Her body shook uncontrollably, her breaths coming in sharp, erratic gasps that bordered on hyperventilation.

"Avantika?" Avyansh's voice broke through, sharp with concern, but she didn't respond. She couldn't.

The memory consumed her entirely. His laughter echoed in her ears, the mocking taunt of someone who knew she couldn't fight back.

His weight was crushing, suffocating. She could still feel his fingers gripping her wrists, the bruises they had left behind as he pinned her down.

Her mind replayed the moment she had begged for mercy, her voice hoarse, tears streaming down her face. She remembered the panic, the helplessness, the overwhelming shame that had threatened to swallow her whole.

"No, no, please don't!" she cried out, her voice rising in pitch, tears spilling down her cheeks like a flood. She clutched her knees tighter, rocking back and forth as if the motion could protect her from the storm raging in her mind.

Avyansh knelt beside the bed, his heart breaking at the sight of her unraveling before him. "Avantika, it's me. You're safe. You're not there anymore," he said softly, his voice trembling but steady.

But his words didn't reach her. She flinched violently when he moved closer, shrinking into herself like a wounded animal. "Don't touch me! Please!"

she sobbed, her voice raw and desperate. Her nails scraped at her own arms as if trying to claw away the memory, leaving red marks in their wake.

Avyansh's hands froze in mid-air. He didn't dare move closer, terrified of making it worse.

His chest tightened painfully as he watched her crumble under the weight of her trauma, her sobs turning into gasps so desperate that it seemed she might stop breathing altogether.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" she cried out, her voice cracking with anguish. "Please, don't hurt me! I'll do anything! Just stop!"

Her words hit him like a dagger to the heart. He could see her drowning, trapped in a memory so dark and overwhelming that it rendered her blind to the present.

Avyansh moved closer, his heart breaking at the sight of her trembling, her face stained with tears. He saw the raw panic in her eyes, the kind of fear that no one should ever have to carry.

"Please, don't touch me," she whispered, her voice so fragile, like glass shattering with every word. She curled tighter into herself, her face twisted in an expression of raw terror, unable to escape the storm raging inside her.

Avyansh froze for a moment, unable to comprehend the depth of her pain and the sudden reply.

He had never seen her like this, so completely broken, and it shattered something deep within him.

"Mishti... listen to me, I'm here," he said, his voice soft but firm, trying to pierce through the chaos of her mind. "I'm here with you."

He gently reached out, his movements slow and steady, as if he feared any sudden action would make her retreat further into herself.

"Hum yahi hai, dekhiye... koi aur nahi hai yaha," he murmured, his voice low and comforting. "Avyansh hai... yeh hum hai."

He carefully pulled her toward him, not forcing her, but allowing her the space to come to him if she could. She resisted at first, her body trembling in his arms, but he held her gently, not letting go.

He felt her struggle against him, her body stiff as a board, her breath still coming in sharp, erratic bursts.

With a quiet, steadying breath, he whispered, "Breathe... with me, okay? Follow my heartbeat."

He placed her hand gently over his chest, where his heartbeat was strong, steady, the rhythm a silent anchor in the storm surrounding them. "Shh... you're safe."

Her tear-streaked eyes fluttered open, meeting his gaze for the briefest of moments. The world outside seemed to fall away, leaving just the two of them in that tiny space. Slowly, almost imperceptibly, she stopped fighting him.

Her breath became less frantic, less ragged, though her body was still trembling in his embrace.

He held her tighter, his hands warm against her cold skin, and continued to guide her through the panic, letting the rhythm of his heartbeat slowly pull her back from the brink. Her tears soaked into his shirt, but he didn't mind. He didn't pull away, he didn't let her go, and he didn't stop speaking.

"It's okay... you're safe here, Mishti. You're not alone."

The words were simple, but they were all he could offer as she clung to him, her body still trembling in the aftermath of the storm inside her mind.

He stayed there with her, offering her his warmth, his strength, and his promise that, no matter how dark her past was, she would never have to face it alone again.

Her sobs eventually softened, though her breathing was still uneven and her body trembled violently.

Finally, her voice came again, small and broken. "I can still feel it... I can't... I can't escape it."

Avyansh's heart shattered. "You don't have to face it alone," he said quietly. "I'm here, I'll never leave you. And I'll do everything in my power to make sure you never feel this way again."

Though her tears didn't stop, something in his voice seemed to anchor her, just slightly. She didn't respond, but her body loosened its rigid curl, if only by an inch.

He stayed there, unwavering, as she cried herself out, his presence a steady reminder that she was no longer alone in her pain.

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"I have tried my best to portray both of them during the panic attack. It was something I haven't written before, and my eyes filled with tears while writing it. I hope you will not only dive into the story because of the love and romance you want, but also understand the depth of their struggles, the pain they carry, and the healing they seek. There's more to this than just the surface emotions, and I truly hope it resonates with you in a way that touches your heart."

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